People talk about their lives in their blogs (Well, about 99.NINEEEEEEEE% of bloggers do). The other point ONE talk about their cats. So here I go, I am going to talk about my life:
(For people who hate reading many words, just read the things in bold and skip anything that isn't.)
I thought about growing my hair out the other day, but I can't fit shampoo into my budget.
I wrote a story an hour ago. The protagonist was present under the Christmas tree. It was small, and all the big presents made fun of it; the small Christmas present was very insecure about itself. Then, at dawn, the children came down the stairs. They immediately went for the larger gifts first, and the petite present protagonist watched as all of the bully presents were instantly ripped to shreds in a festive blaze of wrapping paper gore and ribbon guts! Rejoice!
With the money I save on not buying shampoo, I spend on straws.
I just finished my chemistry lab report. There was a question on it: "What is the overall order of the reaction between CV and hydroxide ion?" I didn't know the answer, so I wrote: "Assuming this is the first date between CV and the hydroxide ion, they most likely are at an upscale restaurant. CV, being more comfortable, for it is a pH indicator and surely has been on dates with nearly all of the periodic table and thus has more experience in such a situation, started by ordering a bottle of red wine. Seeing as wine is acidic, and the hydroxide ion is associated with a base - salt and water will be produced. This will provide both refreshments for the table and seasoning for the filet mignon that CV ordered. The overall order then will be: one bottle of red wine, filet mignon, and a... please don't give me negative points for this answer."
I will save up to a few THOUSAND straws.
I was listening to a song earlier today. I enjoyed it, but the lyrics were awful. It reminded me of when you are talking to a very attractive, yet extremely boring and uninteresting girl. It's like: 'Hey, what are you talking about? I am just going to tone out everything you say, and admire all your other aspects. I am also going to nod my head.' (Nodding either to the beat of the song, or to reassure the girl of your fake interest to her discussion's content.)
I will have all the straws laying next to me while sitting in front of my window which is on the 12th floor of my apartment's building. Then I will open the window, and take each straw, one-by-one, and stick them out the window, taping them each together, and moving them closer to the ground way below me.
I want to become a science journalist. I like science, and I like writing stuff. Only problem is, science journalism is a dying field of work. As it turns out, robots are taking over that particular area of the job market - because they have built in grammar and spell checkers and can write perfectly, have a built in database of every damn science experiment ever done, and don't require any wage because they are fucking robots and don't need money for anything. In fact, no job is safe from robots. The only job humans will be able to get in the future is being a robot programmer.
I will have my friend who is waiting right below me - outside - put a glass of water on the ground. Eventually I will reach the glass with my tape-forged and colossal straw, and drink - through the straw - from a glass, 12 stories below!
P.S. What is this website: http://www.saddestcaveman.com/
P.P.S. Not all people talk about their lives/cats in their blogs. In fact, some people don't talk at all. They just post pictures they drew. If I drew a picture about everything I just wrote, it would look like this:
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i just snorted out loud while reading. i was in public.
ReplyDeleteIt's okay, don't feel bad. Pigs snort all the time in public, so you are not alone.
ReplyDelete